Tough: n. My big - little Sister a.k.a. Mom Jr.

I'm really not sure when it happened. Somewhere between my separation two years ago and my divorce last year... my sister, Jayleigh, changed. She seems matter-of-fact, down-to-earth, and another hyphenated compliment of which I cannot describe.

Anyways, the point is that I'm almost atwitter with excitement for her. Because whether she realizes it or not... she's turned into a really cool adult. True, we're turning "mid-30's" in a few days... but she always seemed a little sheltered before. Damn. Now I want to be her.

There's this thing she does from the bottom of her heart -- see, we both wanted kids but for some reason, God decided it was not meant to be. So she takes care of her neice, Mindy. Mindy's parents are addicts and alcoholics and are completely unreliable. So Jay and her hub, Robert have taken Mindy into their one-bedroom cottage, to live. Little Mindy is a rebellious teen and someone who our dearest mother would have even disowned (she loves kids, but that girly is a handful). So Min lives on a bed precariously placed in Jay's livingroom. For the first time in her life, she has to be accountable for herself (Min), and Jay has matured in a quick hurry. It's really impressive to see how she stepped up to the plate.

Our dear mom has always discouraged me from adopting kids because she fears that I won't love the baby as much as I would one that I gave birth to. Jay says she's wrong, since Min isn't even her girl and she loves her just like she was her own. Jay told me today that raising foster children wouldn't be that much different from what she does with Mindy.

My point? 1) Jay is awesome and cool. 2) M.W. and I have been talking a ton and considering what the landscape of our future would look like if we a) adopted or b) took in foster children.

Today as I worked out at the Y, I sat down in front of the pool windows to watch the babies play. Then I walked by the Kinder room and watched more babies play. They were so sweet and innocent and I can't imagine my life without the opportunity to make a lasting difference in the life of one or more of those sweet faces.