Good Morning Life
I met with my soon-to-be former spouse yesterday. It was civil and I found myself missing him after we traded some civilities. Remember the good times? Tears stream unrestricted from my eyes. But I wasn't really crying. Remeber the inside jokes? We ate and joked and talked about when things were okay with us. He gave me a Christmas gift. He gave me a Christmas gift.

Tomorrow morning, he is leaving town to spend the holidays with his family. Then his family is accompanying him back here for Christmas morning. They want the two of us to be together for that day. I made no committments, and in fact, I've volunteered to work an extended stretch of hours at work so that I don't have to even think about the Holidays. I'm on overnights right now, through mid-January.

Today at the bookstore, I bought him a couple of books. It seemed only right since he bought me a thoughtful gift. You know, it is really confusing to me how he is so serene, and wants to give me all of the time I need. All of a sudden, he's more understanding. He can function on his own. It's like as soon as he lost me, he could function like a normal human being. So my confusion and sadness are mainly remorse that he was never reasonably well-adjusted when he was with me.

There is some hope still left in him, that we'll reconsile one day. That part of me that always wants to make everyone happy, still wants to give him hope. But it left me so cold when I saw him. I wanted to scream and say "DIDN'T YOU EVER LOVE ME?!?!" And if you did, why are you so cold right now? Why am I the only one with tears streaming down her face?

So there is that thing about a weekend in Dallas...
Yeah, I took off to the Dallas metroplex for the weekend. Last weekend. It's close enough to drive it, and I met with colleague for sight-seeing and real food. See, they don't make real food where I come from. But anyways, I had my photo taken in front of the legendary Grassy Knoll. I shopped. I ate a prime rib the size of a house. Good people, good drink, good fun.
I give...
My dearest darling twin wanted the details, because she's nosy. Guess what sissy? I'm not sharing. But she wouldn't relent. She began to accuse me of everything from shirking my familial duties by not showing up at Christmas, to hinting at infidelity to my estranged spouse. I refused to be aparty to that line of questioning. Simply put, it's disrespectful to me. In the end, (we were chatting online when this occurred) she asked me to please never talk to her again, and that she would return my Christmas gifts unopened!